For at du skal lære og komme videre, må du lære av dine feil. Den britiske stormesteren i sjakk, Nigel Davies (copyright Nigel Davies, 2003), sier det slik:

"One important character trait that I've noticed amongst strong players is that they take responsibility for their defeats. If they lose it isn't the fault of the opening, the arbiter or the guy rattling his change when you had to make a critical decision. It's because the opponent played better than you on that particular day. 

So I try to be as gracious in defeat as I possibly can, even if it means biting my lip at the time and forcing myself to congratulate my opponent. Then I think about what I can improve. More difficult to deal with are the feelings of wild triumphalism that I get after winning ..... though I have been told that this is more endearing than the winners who try to be sympathetic towards their beaten opponents."

Ydmykhet betaler seg, ego gjør det ikke.